project 1 feedback

nonbeliver said:
hahaha GREAT! first comment ftw...

musicgreaterthanlife said:
I enjoyed it. I guess mostly because I agreed with what you were saying and disagreed with your mother, but I liked the split screen and how it was set up. I'm no expert on this sort of thing, but I thought it was well done.

Badewell said:
Wow, this really moved me. You did a great job with the mother, almost anyone would be appalled by what she was saying, religious or not. It's easy to see why you feel so indifferent when you have things like that coming your way.

Once I got it, I also really liked how the main character was more focused on his food than the conversation, that sends a crystal clear message of indifference to the viewer.

Very good video, I'm glad I watched it. Thanks for uploading it.

Thunderhorse761 said:
Ah, the things your mother says make me cringe. While I understand that you must respect her, being your mother, I think she should allow you to believe what you want.

Inzanecrazyboy said:
By the sound of it, your mother's a dumbass.

alden6 said:
wow she is fucked up!
i am very atheist, but even if i was devout im sure i would still find this revoulting.
"doctors that dont belive in god are not good docters" my dad would be considered a "heritic" by your mother, but he is the best and most powerfull docter in southern california.
wow she is crazy, raise your children the way you want.

minedarea said:
It's was well made, but I must say it's completely depressing. Not everyone can have a close relationship with their immediate family, I find it uncomfortable to watch because it's a little too true to life.


mark said:
cant complete this, i have some overdue work i need to do, sorry man.
overall, really great for your first project in the class.

negatives:

The colors are excellent but blurs distinction between the left and
right scenes. A college dorm is rarely so home-ish, even though yours
is. Not looking for harsher colors or fluorescent lighting
necessarily, but maybe ... more sparseness. Less contrasting darks and
lights (a barren wall behind the table, or just the computer or
something.

Shadow technique is excellent. Very classy and minimalistic. We don't
want to see the mother. However, it's weird to the eye to see a shadow
on a light source (the lamp) when we don't have a reference point to
the other light source. The pictures on the wall looked great though.
Kept an otherwise static scene interesting by providing symmetry and
contrast (again good choice on colors)

The vocals recorded are the main problem. The mom's voice sounds read
(which it probably was) and cuts you off unnaturally, stutters, etc.
The price to pay when you don't have an actor and you don't have
enough time for multiple takes to compile together. Nobody films a six
minute scene in one take professionally, its usually hours of takes on
footage cut down into the best parts for six - in that i mean hollywood directors, btw. cool natural actors and indie films often pull it off, specifically for the tension it builds.

Secondly, there's an evolution in the sound. The timbre isnt changing
outside of a certain range, and there are momentary leaps for emphasis
but it returns back to a stasis. In my opinion this makes the viewer's
attention drift away. It's like asking someone to listen to a single
tone for six minutes and concentrate on how the tone sounds...our ears
can't do that. When you have a conversation, you don't think about
this since you're busy thinking of what to say and busy following the
other person's thoughts (unless it's a noob). But when you listen to a
conversation between two people, things have to change.

Finally the mic you are using has a boost in the frequencies its
sensitive to around 2khz, but you're speaking probably below 1khz and
it sounds muddy. In that yt video the old guy is also speaking in a
low voice around the same register you are. But it's been equalized to
resonate

[i'll finish this later]

Positives:

A lot of fun to watch the sandwich being eaten. The end scene of
staring down into the glass and swirling the last bit around says a
lot. There's a lot on your mind, a lot to be said, but what the hell.

[finish later]